...not to hijack your celebration of how great it is for YOU to be alive, but seriously, how would I get through moments like this:
ring ring ring ring
Me: [Unnecessarily long necessary greeting incl. name of company and time of day.]
Pt: Hi. [displeased] I guess I need to talk to your account manager.
Me: [pause] Like, just someone who handles [trepidation] patient accounts?
Pt: Uh, Kshhyeah! [as in helloooo I just took a break from tanning in my bikini to make this call what other kind of account manager is there no duh!]
And I was lucky enough to be able to think, "Oh I gotta write 2 of 1 (as I've newly dubbed you & I b/c it is more apt) about this." So thanks for being born. That gigantic gaping hole in my soul if things had gone differently is inconceivable.
Comments on your celebration to follow.
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